By David Haldane
May 6, 2024
It looks like Iโve finally hit a nerve. By which I mean, written something brazenly offensive enough to inspire hate mail.
No, the offending column didnโt reference the war in Gaza nor critically address life and governance in the Philippines.
In fact, what drew the wrath of more than a few readers was my blatant confession of an unforgivable sin: moving a misbehaving stray cat from one location to another.
โYouโre a jerk, David,โ began one of the 83 comments left on Facebook, where Iโd posted my errant piece after it appeared in the newspaper. โShow affection to a poor cat, thenโฆtake it far away and throw it out of the car into an uncertain future? I stopped reading your drivel right then and there. I hope you see that catโs forlorn face in your last days.โ
Hereโs how another readerโs assessed my journalistic abilities: โAn absolutely disgusting article that shows how arrogant some humans can be. You should just stop writing about topics you have no heart forโฆor simply retire. This was pure garbage.โ
At issue was my April 22 column entitled โCalico Cat.โ In it, I recalled the tale of a stray cat in our neighborhood that, despite our best efforts, continuously found its way into our house, jumped onto our table, and insisted on sharing our dinner even after weโd fed it leftovers. Eventually we solved the problem by transporting the delinquent feline several kilometers down the road, whereโfar from โthrowing it out of the carโโwe gently lowered it to the welcoming ground.
โHmm, you think you will get away with this?โ warned the same reader whoโd urged my early retirement. โJust you wait. Karma has your name, and sheโs my friend.โ
Ok, Iโll admit it, that one worried me just a bit.
At least one reader, though, offered what seemed like sensible advice. โThe better option,โ she suggested, โshould have been to trap, neuter/spay, and release.โ
As fate would have it, I spent last weekend on Siargao Island, where a medical mission happened to be visiting my wifeโs hometown of Pilar. And, wouldnโt you know it, one of the visiting missionaries was, yes, a veterinarian.
โLetโs go see what theyโre doing,โ Ivy urged, and so we did.
The first thing I noticed was a small, locked cage containing an extremely nervous-looking cat. โWhat are you doing?โ I inquired.
โOh,โ the vet replied nonchalantly, โnot much, just neutering.โ It was perfect, like a message straight from karma herself. And so I made myself comfortable and sat down to watch.
The vet pulled out an exceedingly long needle. Then, grabbing an enormous chunk of the terrified catโs flesh, sank that steel in. Almost immediately, the animal went limp. But its eyes stayed wide open, still looking terrified as it tried to discern what was about to happen in its nether regions.
Next came the gleaming silver knife, shiny and sharp. The doctor unceremoniously spread open the animalโs hind legs. And thatโs when I turned away, unable to watch any longer. I donโt know how other men feel, but I get extremely uneasy at even the thought of a cutting tool anywhere near my testicles. And so I closed my eyes, trying to obliterate the disturbing images popping up behind their lids.
โDaddy,โ my 4-year-old daughter offered helpfully, โthe cat has blood on it.โ
Oh great, I thought, thanks for the lovely picture. When it was all over, that poor catโstill dazedโlay panting on its side. But all I could see was the sheet underneath it, spattered in red.
OK, Iโm probably gonna catch hell for saying this, butโฆwellโฆif it were me, I think Iโd rather just get banished to a brand-new neighborhood.
___________________________
David Haldane is an award-winning American journalist, author, and broadcaster with homes in Joshua Tree, California, and Northern Mindanao, Philippines. His latest book, A Tooth in My Popsicle, is available on Amazon. This column appears weekly in The Manila Times.
Difficult question. I've had a sporadic back and forth on this subject with several animal do-gooders. I am a dog lover. But feeding strays and curing their many ailments just makes the homeless stray problem worse. It's like Sisyphus, except the more they are successful at pushing, the heavier the rock gets. If they are completely successful, the Philippines would be wall to wall homeless strays. And, sorry, the spaying is best targeted at the females, even through more traumatic and expensive.